Have you ever shared a house or a flat with someone? You are all sitting around the telly watching repeats of Coast and you ask one of your flat mates to nip down the shops and buy a packet of Hobnobs.
There is as much chance of your slovenly flat mate putting on his shoes and coat and heading off to Lidl than there is as getting someone to link to you.
The point I am making is that useful links are extremely difficult to get, if you give it no thought.
If on the other hand you said, “I have a couple of friends coming over, one of them is that girl you really fancy and by the way did I mention that she loves Hobnobs, do we have any in the cupboard?”
The chance of the slobby flatmate heading off to Lidl increases exponentially.
Rather than ask for a link, make it serve the linkers self interest to link.
Make it your goal to know what the linker is interested in, what gets their juices flowing. What makes their linking finger itch?